"Army personnel
in Kuwait unloaded a dozen faulty tanks that only go in reverse. Tanks
that only go in reverse — they've been repackaged and sold to France."
—Craig Kilborn
"I would call the French scumbags, but that, of course,
would be a disservice to bags filled with scum. I say we invade Iraq,
then invade Chirac." —Dennis Miller
"Broadway producers are saying
that because of the war, musicals are suffering from weak ticket sales.
Not only that, over at 'Les Miserables,' the French are refusing to
take part in the revolution." —Conan O'Brien
"I don't know why people
are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After
all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France." —Jay
Leno
"Did you see the new bomb the government came up with? It weights
21,000 pounds. The Air Force tested this bomb in Florida and the bomb
blast was so strong at Disneyworld 25 French tourists surrendered."
—Jay Leno
Q: What do you call a Frenchman advancing on Baghdad?
A:
A salesman.
Q: Is it rude to call a Frenchman a frog?
A: Yes, it is
unfair to amphibians.
Q: Why did the French start using garlic?
A:
To improve their breath.
Q: How are French babies born?
A: With their
hands up (surrendering).
"Finally, this week the French soldiers have showed up in Afghanistan.
Figures — just like the French to show up after the hard work has
been done." —Jay Leno